Being Picky When Befriending

During my life, I have had to move to a different places a number of times, and one thing I learned from the experience, was the art of sizing people up so that I could choose friends quickly and smartly. I discovered that if I chose a friend who’s human values were worse than mine, that I would surely lose my morals in a short period of time. I had to be intimate with someone who had equal or greater morals than mine. Identifying someone’s personal way of living is not as easy as alalyzing their appearance. I had to, as Confucius says in Book 4, verse 7, “Observe closely the sort of mistakes a person makes—then you will know his character.” I knew that everybody makes mistakes, but I would observe how people would react to the mistakes they made. If they simply shrugged at the equivocation, or really endeavored to make amends. This is a great way to identify a person’s heart, the strength of the conscious of the person. I believe I actually got the hang of it after failing a couple of times, and I think this is a skill that everybody should develop. To be in company with equal or greater persons than oneself is the ultimate method of self-improvement.